Imagine how excited Paul Keating must be today
Paul Keating was Collingwood's number one ticket holder when they won the flag in 1990. I used to LOVE watching him attempt to talk footy.
I can imagine Paul Keating on grand final day morning. He’s tossed and turned all night, too nervous to sleep. Finally, he takes a sleeping tablet, because he knows that if he doesn’t catch at least a few minutes of shut eye, he’ll be less than fresh for the big game and might even miss KISS. He sets his clocks to wake up for Fox Footy’s Longest Kick Competition. I like to imagine that our ex Prime Minister and famed clock collector sets one of these next to his pillow on Grand Final eve and possibly all four:
It was the right club for him to choose. A working class club, a traditionally Catholic club, a working class club, a Labor grassroots club, and from the pure political side of things, the largest supporter base in the country. The only issues he had was that the Carmen he wanted to see wasn’t also called Phil.
My favourite caption in a BigFooty thread on this topic was this one:
This was one of the streams of bullshit I ran out for one of my grand final week MC jobs. I was at the MCG three days in a row, soaking up the fun and atmosphere of the precinct, and entertaining footy audiences with some excellent guests.
One of those was Western Bulldogs 2016 premiership captain, Easton Wood. I told Easton as he approached the stage that he holds a very special place in my Google Photos, for the fact that at some point I photoshopped my dad’s head onto his body, and that he’s the only AFL footballer, past or present, who has earned this honour.
I can’t remember why I did it. My dad’s name is Ray, and the only clue is #ThorRaynorrak written beside the photo.
Easton told me when he arrived on stage that this jumper was designed for the first game at the rechristened ‘Marvel Stadium’ and was a hot seller. You cannot buy this jumper, in case you’re a doggish Thor fan.
Easton was humble, and I tried to be humble too, which is more difficult for me because I make it my mission each year at the Monash Blues lunch to remind them of the 9 goals one behind I kicked against them at Princes Park in 2003. This year, I thought we should celebrate with balloons:
My head is the decimal point here in the 9.1. I’m too scared to show my University Blacks teammates, because I had a high ball drop, was a little erratic in front of the sticks, and this configuration is probably more emblematic of my career:
My grand final morning gig was at Zinc at Federation Square, and every year it’s a parade of champions. On Saturday, it was Nick Maxwell, Jonathan Brown, Simon Black and Tony Shaw, and the mood in the room was as magnificent as the match that followed. [between them: 8 premierships, 2 as captain, two Norm Smiths, a Brownlow, a Coleman, 8 All Australians and 1099 AFL games.]
Keep reading with a 7-day free trial
Subscribe to Good one, Wilson! to keep reading this post and get 7 days of free access to the full post archives.