I was about to delete this video from my phone, and then I thought, no I’m not going to do that. I love this video. I love Lynley Dodd and ‘Slinki Malinki’. This is why I write children’s books. Because one day, when a blue moon rises to cast its shimmery glow over a snowball that is actually making a good fist of it in hell, I’m going to write a line that is as fun to read out loud as ‘Ro Ro Ro Ro went the dogs on the block.’
The literary journal ‘Kill Your Darlings’ asked me to write a couple of hundred words on ‘what I wish I’d known about writing for children’. My response is below. You should subscribe to KYD to support independent publishing and keep them going. And while you’ve got your credit card out …
I became a children’s book author because I thought of a pun one night doing the dishes. It was about my Mum turning into a dinosaur when she gets migraines, making her ‘Migraineysaurus Rex’.
I suspected little kids wouldn’t read a book about migraines. But I kept saying it, and it morphed into ‘My Grannysaurus Rex’. Genius tile, surely! I figured if I could execute, we’d sell millions! What I didn’t know about the industry is that children’s author millionaires are as rare as 169 storey treehouses.1
I didn’t know that picture book manuscripts should be 32 pages and about 500 words. I didn’t know that not being able to draw would be a career impediment. I’ve published a dozen picture books, but they don’t really have a unified ‘look’.
Grannysaurus was a good title idea though. This has been proven by the fact that David Walliams is now making millions from the same title. Well, not exactly the same. Mine was ‘Grannysaurus Rex’. His is ‘The Grannysaurus’.
It’s been a joy writing for kids. For me, it’s a vehicle for silliness, a combination of storytelling and joke construction, that’s made easier if you’ve grown up listening to songs and poetry.
If you’re writing kids books because they’re shorter than adult novels, it’s not going to work for you. But do you know what’s great? They are shorter than adult novels. I must do another one.
I’m half way through my posts about the trip to Japan with my 14 year old son, Harry. There will be a few more of those this week.
The always generous Andy Griffiths is actually a paid supporter of Good one, Wilson. Thank you Andy!
Ro-Ro-Ro-Ro went the dogs on the block